Still miss you sweet sister of mine...

It's been 23 years since my precious sister Laura Jennifer Miller went home to be with her Lord and Savior.  She and 4 other girls were in a car accident on October 17, 1988 and Laura passed away on the morning of October 18, 1988. Jamie Dittmer and Karena Palmer were killed instantly and Wendy Whitlock and Susan Ikel were injured and spent several weeks in the hospital and many months in therapy. My life was changed that day and never the same. I never "got over it" however I did learn to live with it and the changes it brought to my life. The road of grief and recovery is a long hard road and I'm so thankful for so many people who walked faithfully with me through that journey.

My sister and I had always been so very close. Our family had been close. I think too because our dad was in the ministry alot of times and in different situations Laura and I only had each other. I grew up knowing she had my back and she was my very best friend. Many years, we shared a bedroom so the talking and giggling would go into the wee hours of the night. Even after we had separate bedrooms, more often than not Laura would come get in bed with me. We both loved to play the piano and sing. We loved to sing together. That was something I was not prepared for after her death...I couldn't sing. I could still play the piano but every time I tried to sing I would fall apart so I quit trying. It wasn't until 5 years ago the Lord gave me my voice back. I have sung a few times in the past 5 years with my sweet little family. That was a blessing!

Somedays it still seems so real and I can recall the events around that time so clearly other days it seems so unreal and I know that's Gods way of protecting me and healing my heart. Things still 23 years later can catch me off guard and I miss Laura tremendously. I smile whenever I remember her and how she could make me and so many others laugh. She continues to live on through my children which is such a gift. My middle daughter Lauren, who is named after Laura, looks alot like her and has so many of her same features and mannerisms. My youngest Natalie has the same carefree spirit and sense of humor as my sister. What's so amazing is they never knew my sister yet I think the Lord allows some of those sweet reminders in our life to help in the healing process.  My oldest son Tyler was just 3 months old when Laura was killed and I KNOW he was my gift from God. Because of him I had to get out of bed everyday as I needed to be mom and care for my precious son. I was always so thankful that Laura did get to meet Tyler and spent many hours holding him and loving on him. 

Someday we will be reunited in heaven and for that I am so grateful! Laura knew the Lord as her personal Savior and her faith was such a  real part of her daily life. I know my faith in the Lord is what has pulled me through...I could never have imagined living my adult life without Laura. There are many times when I'm still frustrated as I long for my sister...to hear her voice and see her beautiful smile and I'm sad I never could be an aunt or my children didn't know their Aunt Laura. It was hard becoming an only child. I do not pretend to understand God's ways however I can rest in Him and know He will always be with me and continue to mend that part of my heart that was so broken after my sister died.

The picture at the top of this post is her Western Baptist College ASB card picture that my parents received in the mail after her death. It is one of my very favorite pictures of her. She was such a beautiful vibrant person who loved life and especially loved her family and her friends and most of all her Lord Jesus Christ. The outfit she's wearing in this picture was something I bought for her that summer she started her freshman year at college. I loved it on her because it made her pretty green eyes stand out!   

She will always be in my heart and I will cherish forever every moment I had with

my sister...my Laura-padora!!!

Finally Home

I want to share about my client  I had the honor and privilege of caring for over the last 4 years. I worked for Comfort Keepers for 5+ years and one summer day in July 2007, my world changed! I was sent to a clients home because she was having temporary care after a broken wrist. When I entered her home it was so calm and peaceful and oh so beautiful! She was 86 and I do believe one of the sweetest women I  ever met. We talked easily and "hit it off" immediately. As I put her in bed that night she told me she could tell we would be friends and she knew I was a christian. We prayed that night and thus began the prayer I heard countless times over the next 4 yrs. Her prayer and hearts desire was to go home to be with her Lord. She felt she had lived a long wonderful life and was just ready. ( I kid you not, she prayed that everyday!)

I always told her the Lord still had plans for her here on this earth. One of which was that I could learn and grow from her testimony and example to me. She was one of the most extraordinary people I have ever known. That's a whole blogpost in and of itself. I also became very close friends with many of her family for which I will be forever grateful! The Lord had so many wonderful plans when He brought our paths together.

When I began blogging  last week I noticed the "about me" which I had set up over 2 months ago still said I worked for Comfort Keepers as a caregiver. I could not bring myself to change it even though  I needed to because on August 2 my sweet client did have her prayer answered and she entered into HEAVEN at 7:05 a.m. on my shift. Although it was painful to watch her go it was also the highest privilege to hold her hand as she took her last breath here on earth.

She was indeed FINALLY HOME!